And in the morning I'll be with you

But it will be a different kind - Bon Iver

His album rocks so much. That's all I have to say about that.

Finished my weekend feast of food,I could eat like this every weekend but that would be foolish to say the least. I went to my aunts house for the big feast on Saturday and as always I was not disappointed. Everything I ate was so good!! The turkey, stuffing, lasagna, mashed potatoes, curry and the pasta were all awesome, hands down the best meal I've had all year. My uncle is a good cook, dare I say on par with my mom as his pasta and turkey were very good. I look forward to xmas!!!

Everything I've done up to this point should have been a learning experience for me, I still can't nail down what I learned, if anything and most importantly if the experiences had were good or bad, I may never know the actual result of each decision I've made but the most important part is that I made a decision when the time called for one. I've come to see that I am more content with making choices even if those choices end up in failure, I should learn from each failure and move on as each failure from here is an experience I wouldn't of had otherwise, I see what my friend tells me about going broke, cause once your ego and pride are gone you really have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Most recently I've struggled with my conscience, weighing my morals against my selfishness to be or not to be? that really was my question. I've made my choice and I'll never know the result till many years have passed. On this journey I haven't been "wrong" per se, cause every experience I've had allowed me to catch myself from making them again, this I know will be the same, with no result in sight I am eager to see where this goes.

I've been talking to my buddy in Korea, he's changed and I am very happy for him. I sense he's coming into his own being over there, discovering what makes him so awesome. Our conversations are different and I can tell he's growing as a person, I told myself that if our friendship grows apart during this year I'll be ok with that, as people grow their ideas and concepts change learning to adapt to that has been a big thing for me, as I continue to learn and grow I am sure he'll do the same.

I went on a date and though the date went well, I feel like an empty cookie jar with no cookies left. Through the course of this date I had been quite happy and in high spirits but as the night wore on I began to see that this person was very sad inside, I wanted to give them a hug and never let go, but my hug would do them no good, emotionally guarded use to be my thing and right now I am not so sure. As I looked into their eyes I could see that the walls were built and there was no way I was going to get through that, would it even be worth it knowing that someday I would be shut out from the walls I once broke down? At this point I am sure about a few key points, but the rest is up to fate.