Rascall Flatts - I'm Movin On

Only 22 days in and I find myself somewhere I haven't been in a while, isolation. I made a decision to leave behind a few things that were not helping me progress which was frustrating for me seeing as I had no idea what would happen, but in my gut I knew it was for the best. I didn't stop cold turkey but it seems like it. Recently I've been trying to connect with my sis, overall she's pretty damn awesome, (weird how siblings can be like that huh?) She's never been accustomed to my goofiness, nor my ability to take things seriously in her presence. The side I see of her is an opposite of me in some ways, others not so much. I find myself playing the big bro part more and more, maybe it's her way of communicating or me doing what's expected, I just know for now I am doing feels good and that's all that matters.

My ideal of work took a hit yesterday, it's not all peaches and cream, I almost forgot how unruly and ruthless the world of big business can be. I saw first hand what corporate restructuring looks like as a few co-workers got let go. Having to say goodbye to friends is not awesome. I have good memories working with them, I will remember all the praises they gave me, they were so good at raising my spirits when I was down and so awesome at making me feel at home when I first got here. Naturally I feel for them, they have families, mortgages, property taxes, car payments and I wonder how they'll manage. I spent my last few thoughts before bed thinking about them and their families. I was thinking the quote "whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger." surely applies here.

I've been working on "Project Awesome" for quite some time, and it has worked out as great as I imagined. I often get asked "what the hell is this awesome thing about?" I always tell them it's whatever you want it to be, good, bad, horrible, great, awesome is whatever you want it to be. Lately that has not been the case at my work. My place of work is polluted with cynicism, and I fear that I am allowing it to pollute me. All I know is nothing is for certain. Outside of this place life is awesome, where I enjoy the pleasures of my choosing. I will find a way to pass through this and be awesome once more I am sure of it. I'm so awesome.